September 9, 2008

Okay, this is going to be kind of a whiney blog entry, so if you don’t like it, well… just move along and read the other stuff on my blog and ignore this one. I guess I just feel like venting a little and no one else is around, and this is part of the reason I started this blog – to write about stuff!

Change is good, but slow moving and frustrating. It’s really hard to leave a job you’ve worked at for almost 9 years (even though you’ve stopped enjoying it, it’s still comfortable) and go to another job where you feel like there’s so much you don’t know and you’re feeling awkward around your new co-workers. I wish I could just download all the information I need to know – I hate  not knowing stuff.  It’s a control thing with me.  Talk about taking you out of your comfort zone! Not that I didn’t expect it – I knew it would be like this for awhile, but it’s still hard. It’s also why I still feel change is good, and it is good for people to try new things and take on new challenges. So none of these feelings are unexpected, but still frustrating.  It’s also hard to be going between the new and the old job.  It stresses me out trying to get stuff from the old job finished up when I am just ready to move on.  Oh well, it will all work and I am really going to enjoy the new job as soon as all the initial awkwardness wears off.  If only I could inherit a pile of money from some long lost relative or something.  Or win the lottery (like I even play it).  Then I just wouldn’t have to work and I could stay home with Dillan all day long.  Now that would be a dream come true!

Besides my work Dave’s job is driving me crazy!  He’s had some things going on that we seem to have to put everything on hold for and every time I think it’s done it’s not.  (Yes, hon, I know its not your fault.)  Sure, we’ve gotten to go do a few things here and there, but I just get this almost panic feeling that we only have a few weeks of good weather left and there’s things I’d like to go do before it’s gone.  There’s also a lot of things that need to be done on the outside of the house before winter.  It’s a depressing thought to wonder why you’ve felt so busy all summer, but at the same time you feel like you’ve accomplished absolutely nothing!

Okay… enough of the complaining.  I have a lot to be thankful for.  A new house (which I love), great husband and kids, Dave’s family & mine, good friends, and I could go on and on.  We could definately be worse off!  So I will shut up now and cheer up and move on.  Even now I’m thinking maybe I shouldn’t even publish this, but I will share it with everyone anyway.  It’s good to go outside my comfort zone!  Right?